If you have attended a number of weddings, you will probably conclude that most follow a set of predetermined rules. Not to say that everything would be identical, but I bet you can count a couple of activities that seem similar. Could there be a set of rules to follow at a wedding? If your answer is yes, my response to that is, “Rules are meant to be broken”, at least for the moment.
A vegan wedding is a chance for you to stand out from the crowd, change the norm by doing something new. You would be surprised to know that as much as veganism has grown over the years, there is still a large number of people who doubt vegan weddings. This could be due to lack of adequate information or the fear of trying something outside the family norms. As a vegan planning to wed, you most definitely have concrete reasons why. These could vary from health related issues, being mindful of the environment, to reduction of animal suffering. Whatever the reason it may be, you would want a state of the art wedding, safe to say, this is the day you would want to dress and dine to impress.
Usually most vegans do not hide the passion for their vegan life. They come out in the open and non-vegans would definitely be the first to notice the difference. So when it comes to your vegan wedding, why change for their sake? Stick to your guns! Of what use is a friend who cannot look past their own stomach for just one day. It is better if they do not attend the ceremony. Truth is, their absence would make work easier for you anyway. Remember this is your day, and for ones you only want to be around people who mean good for you on this day.
The other way to handle this would be to choose not to let the guests know you are serving only vegan foods. Most would end up eating the meal unknowingly and enjoy it. The pomp of the occasion would fill the air so much that the idea of the type of food would not bother them. This would be a great way of getting non-vegans into veganism. Psychology has it that the brain only passives what it registers, in this case they would have registered good exotic foods.
My point is, do not compromise your beliefs for the sake of friends. Veganism is not a sacrifice but a healthy way of living. It is your devout way of life and whether your friends and family like it or not, it is who you are. You owe none of them an apology.